Sadly,I hate to say this but...I've been involved in a sqiurrel attack.If you,or a loved one has too,here are some tips for futre refrence.
1.It sure looks like a sqiurrel can climb trees dosen't it.Well the truth is that a squirrel has little suction cups taped to the're feet.They take 'em of when the're running fast,so,if a sqiurrel is chasing you,run up a tree.(Warning:If the sqiurrel waves at you DON'T WAVE BACK.It's an old sqiurrel trick that'll make you fall out of the tree).
2.Sqiurrels are known to know Martial Arts,so for self-defense,go to your nearest ninja traning center.
3.Sqiurrels like "nuts",so refer to "going bananas".
4.Sqiurrels don't like the smell of dog poop,so,to be safe,roll around in dog poop.
5.Sqiurrels look cute on the outside, don't they?Well don't pet one!If you do they'll turn into vicous man-eating warriors!That's all.